My second night in my hometown. It´s midnight. Quiet. Dark. Freezing outside. Here I am with tons of thoughts and feelings. Shocked by some bad news from people I love. Some of them are sad, trapped in a grey society with prejudices and boundaries. That´s why I left years ago. Cause I didn´t fit in. I didn´t like it and I was done with my city. I wanted to fly. And so I did. What it surprises me it´s to see people I love suffering and sacrifying their lives, for what? Disappointment, lies, and ungrateful assholes. I don´t know if it´s the city, the weather, the same things everyday, same job, monotony, family, grey buildings, grey people, grey lifes, society in general but why they keep living like this? Unhappy everyday, working their asses for nothing and living in a huge bubble of lies and denial. Yeah, that´s the word, denial. Or fear? Fear to make a decision and confront other people´s thoughts?
I was talking to my sweet cousin Pablo, a great and wonderful guy, happy, who loves and cherries his wife. He is lucky he found her, she is lucky she found him. They surf when they have the time, and enjoy all the beautiful things this planet has for us. They honest with each other and they respect each other. And he thinks like me, like my sisters. People like Pablo prove that you can be happy in a city. It´s just the attitude you have with life. You can be happy anywhere you live if you are with the right people around.
I live far away from my clan, but I know they are with me all the time and we, the Garraus, are all the same. They complete me. No matter how bad things are sometimes, now matter how lonely I can feel (I´m human too), they are with me. Maybe that´s the thing that keeps me strong and happy. Or maybe is the fact that I have several and wonderful friends like me. Or maybe is the fact that I just be myself and I don´t live under other people´s thoughts.
That´s a common thing here in Pamplona and the rest of the cities: Society, gossip, hypocrisy. And ask myself: why these friends have to deal with people they don´t deserve? It is that difficult for them to find someone honest, spontaneous, and genuine? Do they have to stick and be punished for the rest of their lifes? Perhaps they will have to confront themselves one day, look deep inside them, love themselves more, and make the decision to be free. Some people live in the past, a memory, something it is not going to happen again. Don´t live in the past, don´t worry about the future. The past is a mere glimpse of stardust, it´s gone. You already lived and enjoyed it. Keep moving forward. Live every day and your actions will lead you where you want. But you have to make your own actions for You. Only You, and then the others. So tonight, I wish with all my heart that my special friends will have someday soon happiness and somebody who adores them.